Like most girls and women out there in this weird age where you can open an app and somebody with the ‘perfect body’ is smiling up at you, I have had some trouble with accepting and loving myself, my personality, my body and all the things in between like little habits etc
Learning to accept who you really are is tough but you’re already on the right path by clicking on this Blog Post, whether it was because you’re following me already or you are searching this stuff up. I really believe that all it takes is a change of perspective, the tough part is accepting the new perspective.
The problem is, is that we believe certain things about ourselves that no one has told us to believe, no one sat down and told you that you don’t like your nose or your hair! We don’t see this happening so it feels natural to sit and look ourselves and not be happy! So when someone says “no, actually, you’re fricken beautiful” it feels unnatural which is totally backwards!!
If you don’t believe me think of a baby, do you think they feel insecure about their adorable little tummy and big cheeks? No, because nobody has taught them anything about how they ‘should’ look yet!
You may be tired of hearing “the media this, the media that” in these sorts of posts, I know I got sick of hearing it for a while but the sooner you realise that the media and everyone who wants to sell you anything pries on our insecurities and will either say “this will fix you!” or “this will help you forget!” they’re essentially making money off of your insecurity don’t tell me this isn’t true, once you’ve seen it you’ve seen it!
So, the first step to realising that you’re absolutely perfect just the way you are is to remember that literally no one else matters when it comes to you and your body or personality. It doesn’t matter what that stupid boy in school thought, it doesn’t matter if that guy didn’t notice you and it doesn’t matter if someone finds you annoying!!
Beauty is within right? So firstly we’ll talk about your personality… People don’t always get on. Fact. So, like I said, if someone doesn’t like you or finds you annoying or whatever then ok! One less person you have to not be yourself around! We can’t learn to love who we really are if were not truly being who we are.
I went through a lot of fazes in school where I saw a group of girls and wanted to be their friend so I would mould my personality to fit in with them. I joined one school from another right after everyone had figured out who their friendship group were and it sucked and I lost who I was because I was trying to please and fit in to all these different groups of girls.
Heres a thing… I don’t like girls of school ages, some of em are alright but for the most part I get on with the guys, less bitchin more not caring about stupid stuff you know? I didn’t realise this until later on in my school career but once I did, I still got on with some girls, we obviously talked… and my closest, closest friends have always been girls because you can talk boys and periods and they don’t get freaked out… girls are also super caring but it depends on who you find.
At the end of the day we all have personalities, sometimes they clash so don’t feel guilty for not getting on well with someone, don’t think that this is a reflection of you or your personality!
I’m not just talking about school either and I’m aiming this at my home girls because thats my personal experience but if you’re in the workplace too, I imagine – I hope – it is significantly easier but remember that you don’t like everyone and not everyone is going to like you!
If you’re a bit of a dousche then try figure it out but really just focus on surrounding yourself with positive people who you can really be yourself around, no eyebrows and all! (Don’t pretend like you don’t know)
As for our bodies well, I’m a believer in Jesus (my main man) and it says in the Bible that we are Fearfully and Wonderfully made, how cool is that?! A great big God created the heavens the stars, the ocean and everything in it as well as every beautiful sunset you’ve ever seen and he said it was “good” and then he made us, he made you and he said we are “very good” people overlook language used in the bible and forget what its really saying amongst the paragraphs and paragraphs of text but they didn’t really say “it was cool” and then “it was super fricken awesome” back then and that has kept me going and believing in myself more times then I could count!
Take a moment and look in the mirror and look at your eye, heres some things you may or may not already know about the human eye, first of all, we see everything upside down, our brains switch it round the right way! Secondly, when something gets really close to our faces and our eyes go a bit crossed and we start seeing two of everything, the reason – if you wait – that we slowly see things come into focus is because our brain goes “hang on… there isn’t two of everything duh!” and it changes what we see!! Now, while you’re looking in the mirror and remembering those things look at how fricken beautiful your eye alone is, it is its own perfect shade, it has its own little weird squiggly lines, heck, some of us have different patches of colours or even two eyes of different colours! Now take a step back and look at yourself, your eye alone is super cool and you don’t think that makes the rest of you the least bit cool too?
I don’t care what shape you are, how tall or short you are, if you have moles (I do, nice and visible on my neck) or anything! I don’t care, you are a human being and the chances of you being one are ridiculously slim, so without thinking of anything else look in the mirror and say “wow isn’t it cool that I am alive?” and list some things you’re grateful for, you have access to the internet because you’re reading this which means you have access to a world of knowledge! Thats something to be thankful for, even if your thing isn’t thanking God, its thanking the universe or karma or whatever… Practicing gratitude has helped me so much in appreciating the little things even if I’ve had a terrible day, I’m still thankful that I can crawl into bed and have a roof over my head at the end of it all, not everyone has that luxury.
Now list of some things you do like about yourself, it can be anything, don’t give the negativity the time of day! It doesn’t deserve your attention and it certainly doesn’t deserve your heart! For example, I have pretty small lips, I haven’t liked that about myself since I can remember, but they are heart shaped… thats pretty cool. I have quite big shoulders too that can make me feel a bit too ‘manly’ and makes dress shopping bloody hard but they make me a great boxer and an excellent swimmer! My stomach has never been flat. I was obsessed with the idea of ‘what it would be like to have a flat stomach’ for a long time before I realised that I didn’t want one, it’d look so weird! can you imagine my big ol shoulders sitting on a slim body? If I didn’t have the curves that I do I’d have a lot more to dislike about my disproportioned self!
Like I said, the hardest part isn’t hearing the other perspective but accepting it, seeing those things about yourself that you don’t like and either saying “screw it, when I’m old I’m going to wish I had this body again” or turning them into something or seeing them in a new light so you do like them!
I truly wish that I could hold up a magical mirror to every single person not his planet and let them see how beautiful they are, how awesome I think you are and how perfect God made you! But I can’t, it has to come from within, you have to do this on your own. No blogger or youtuber or celebrity can do it for you, the guy you’re with or like can’t do it for you and as much as she wishes she could, your mum can’t either.
I would like to give you some homework for review next week! You’re going to write down 3 things, no matter how small or seemingly insignificant, that you like about yourself and during the week you’re going to take time out of your day to look in the mirror and choose to only see those things and admire them, then the next week you’ll add another thing and so on. Also, remember to practice gratitude, you become a lot more grateful for the working body you have when you do this!
Remember, Work Hard, Have Fun and Make a Difference!